Tuesday, February 7, 2012

soul deep, reap, sow & sewn, blessed

 everyone feels loss
last week we said goodbye to a family member
the celebration was full of colour & great memories
it was an honor to have known her
in my first memories of her, she was a princess
the bride of my eldest cousin
she was someone with whom you could connect
in an honest 'true self' way
she was a woman who reaped what she sowed
no pretense or hiding behind histories & no games
just real thoughtful gracious caring heart-felt godly living
49 is too early when you look from the outside in
but she was ready to meet her maker
so many loved ones before her to greet her & welcome her home
& where she will revel in the celebration of her kingdom come
she has run the race & fought the good fight
she has kept the faith
God speed KGS
i choked & stumbled in my own humanity
in saying a humble goodbye
& watched in awe how her very near & dear
found such strength
A, R, M & E you are amazing
times at BH will always be cherished i am sure
so to this extended family of mine
who've 'had their moments'
let us get on with living
remembering & celebrating
but truly living ...
& to all my old & new friends
you are a gift in my life
treasured gold
lately i've been stuck with
a pounding in my ears ... 
in a mix of the good & not so 
of exhausted unnecessary energies,
sunshine-y days spent with toes buried in river sand & mud
that add up to the usual 
summer creative slump
(PS: i saw another sausage dog ... are they reminding me?)
& of course the loss of the above mentioned 
wonderful lady ...
but also grieving the
lost opportunities of family times 
that could have been
& i haven't been able to focus creatively
on what 're-charges' me!
have you noticed some silence here?
last night i was able to make a start
i turned my overflowing
fabric scrap box out on the table
& pieced (while at SAY) ... piece by peace!
i see a kind of symbolism here:
in the taking the parts of the old
& making them into something new
it was good
today is a new day

music always swells my emotion & often surfaces 
the essence of my thoughts in words 
that i can't perhaps voice on my own
here's a current favourite verse

Throw your soul through every open door

Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turn my sorrow into treasured gold
You'll pay me back in kind and reap just what you've sown


nicole said...

today is a new day. love it!
glad to see you back :D

Cas said...

love love love it. i thought you said you didnt have a way with words....so not true :) i hope your heart heals soon & may the mending of mending bring comfort to the soul :)

Allen Sibley said...

Thanks so much for your thoughts and encouragement Wendy. Love you!

Cath said...

Wendy, I was so sorry to hear of your sad family news. It was a pleasure to sit beside you last night and watch you turn your scraps into beautiful new pieces. Thank you. C x

Meredith said...

Hi Wendy - it would have been nice to meet last week. Just not the first thing on our minds. Happy peacing :)